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Not-Yet-Married excerpts

Currently reading the first few chapters of the book. The excerpts below remind me of one of the scenes from my favorite movie, “Little Women”.


“ The not-yet-married life, by nature, cultivates independence. As we move out of the home and out from under our parents’ authority, we take on more responsibility. We also typically be- come less accountable to others. We’re on our own now. The longer we’re not yet married, the more easily and aggressively we can move into isolation. Independence from our parents becomes independence from everyone. I know what I need. I pay my bills. I decide my schedule. I cook my food (or at least pick it up in the drive-through). I’m an adult. I don’t need anyone anymore. Inde- pendence can breed isolation, and isolation separates us from the grace we need and sets us against the first and greatest calling on our lives. No one was made to be truly single—to live for God’s glory solo. Proverbs warns us, “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment” (Prov. 18:1). No one was made to go it alone. Independence is one vital aspect of Christian growth and maturity, but so is dependence— dependence on God and dependence on others around us. Jesus says, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).”


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